A few hours ago in my African-American History & Culture class. One of my classmates asked our professor a particular question. A student stated: if our cultural roots are from Africa and several Africans practice Polygamy. As an African-American in the U.S.A, I'm a Christian who was taught Polygamy is wrong.
What should I believe/follow?
The thoughts/beliefs of my ancestors or what I was taught by my Christian parents?
The female who posed the question, was filled with genuine concern. While our instructor spoke, she scooted back in her seat looking at the professor in awe; as if she held the answer to a sacred riddle. While listening to the professor & several other classmates’feedback, I was on the brink of combustion. I waited for an opportunity to speak, reverting to a similar yet different incident from my
past.
Summer of 1988 - Bible study
In that day’s lesson our bible study teacher discussed how the earth was formed, Adam & Eve and The Garden of Eden. Being that we were young, students were encouraged to interact with their studies. Focusing our attention to gain understanding.
What I remember most about that day, is my bible study teacher stating: Adam and Eve helped God name all the animals in Eden. Whenever she held up a picture of an animal she asked the class to make the animals sound. When we saw a cow we all said “mooooooooo”. For a duck we said “quack, quack”, for a snake we said “Sssssssss” so on and so forth.
After telling us about the animals, she went on and told us the story of Eve & the serpent; causing Adam and Eve to be removed from the Garden of Eden because they disobeyed God. In my 7 year old mind (my age at the time) what we were told left me confused.
I recalling moving around in my seat, vigorously waving my hand in the air to ask a question. I asked my bible study teacher: “You just told us that Adam & Eve helped God name all the animals in his Kingdom and they knew the sound each animal made” my teacher responded: correct. So I went on and stated: If Eve helped God name a snake and she knew it made a hissing sound, why did she listen when it spoke to her? Doesn’t she know a snake can’t talk?
I will never forget the look on my bible studies teacher’s face. Not only did she NOT answer my question, she told me I cannot question the word of God, to accept it. As I explained what she told us didn’t make sense & continued to ask questions, I was kicked out of bible study….. never to return.
Fast forward, to the present.
The recollection of the incident above caused me to become upset during today’s lecture. It had a smidgen to do with religion, culture or race, and a vast majority to do with THINKING.
As an adult, I know at the age of seven, my thought process caused me to ask my teacher that particular question. I also know my mind was impressionable. If I was answered in a different manner, more than likely I would be a Christian today. Being that I wasn't, I went on to study various religions. I learned to gravitate towards & embrace thought, the ability to question - an exploration to find what coincides within my being.
When it was finally my turn to speak to my classmate (knowing she was young with an impressionable mind) I emphasized individuality and the importance of her thoughts/thinking process. I stated in order to obtain a feasible answer she cannot readily/blindly accept the ideologies of her parents, the words of a professor, or anyone else for that matter (not even me).
She owes it to herself to quell her curiosity/concern/misunderstanding(s).
Hypothetically, one must ponder: If your parents never passed on their belief of Christianity what religion would you follow/prefer? If you were born in Africa would you participate in Polygamy or disapprove it?
Where do you stand as an individual?
Remove herself from all that she’s learned/taught through domestication.
If you don't want to broach different religious sects, practices & beliefs. Simply ask yourself questions you can already answer, ex: If you’re in a relationship and you cheat or were cheated on. How would you react?
What feels right/wrong to YOU?
Trying to learn something in a day by asking a question, is a disservice to yourself. Realistically it can take your entire life span via experiences to understand what one seeks.
In the process you obtain clarity of life, your perception, emotions, feelings and thoughts.
Daily, as you become in tune with self and the world around you.
Therein lies revelation(s).
It isn't a desire of mine to impose who I am on others. So, I answered her question, by not my answering her question. But by asking her more questions.
I pushed her to THINK which will lead to a conclusion that is hers and hers alone.
We inhabit societies where people rather feed you answers to what's already been asked/given to interpretation. Then spark thought in the mind; asking something different.
Regurgitation from family, teachers, books, friends, t.v,. etc.
Doesn't show one how to break something down & dissect it.
It doesn’t show you any depth of understanding.
It only shows what to accept & what to reject outside of a specific mold.
Most of the time individuals don’t know why, they simply follow.
They're Sheeple.
Enclosing I'd like to present a quote & end with a visual clip & artistic expression(s).
"Question with boldness even the existence of a God; because, if there be one, he must more approve of the homage of reason, than that of blindfolded fear." ~*Thomas Jefferson
An individual will complain/vent to another about themselves or circumstance(s).
In an attempt to uplift whomever is speaking, the person listening will say: someone has it worse/it could be worse.
On a daily basis, people either tell this to themselves, or hear it from others.
Whenever I hear those words - it's drenched in egotism.
I often ponder:
Why does it take comparison to someone else, or the worse case scenario to appreciate what you have? Why not embrace your struggles, accept flaws, evaluate every set back, love yourself & the life you were given.
Everything endured builds character, as it strengthens.
It doesn't break you.
Understand:
You were either born into a rigorous environment
that was never in your hands to control.
Or your past deeds lead you to where you are today.
You're a voyager on a trail, your actions created.
If you're displeased or unhappy change direction.
If you continue on the your path,
glancing at the hardships of others to feel good about yourself.
I purchased this journal June 12, 2002. Gazing at the cover provides a visual to a snippet I've written years prior.
"Lost in the prism
Of emotions hieroglyphics Overwhelmed by the mystic Not knowing what is to become Overwhelmed by sensations Once vivid are benumbed Blackness succumbed Submerged my essence Voids the serene presence Born from it's death lives A supreme being In life can’t be seen in Camouflaged By the life I was given I'm not seen For my multiple dimensions My external layer Is all that is mentioned……."
Today, I'd replace the word emotions with thoughts. I am "Lost in the prism of thoughts hieroglyphics" Living is to decipher them.
Earlier or should I say yesterday, I posted a poem/song (entry below this one). Various individuals assumed I was sad, which couldn't be further from my truth, but it's theirs. Which lead me to think - I can state a hundred positives, or ask a serious question & it'll be overlooked. Yet, a perceived negative draws others, like a moth to a flame.
I live by the motto: If you live it, you have to claim it & that's exactly what I did.
Granted, everyone isn't open about themselves/experiences. Or lack there of. To me, it is wasted energy pretending to be something your not. No one is above demoralizing qualities. Nor is anyone on earth one way all the time - having a multitude of haters (no one but the person being hated upon sees). But if that's your facade, by all means stick to it.
The pendulum swings
The scales are unleveled
Different sensations are immersed in a days course
The ability to think, feel & articulate oneself
Equate balance
Whether I'm writing/conversing about perception, Dr. Laura's rant, music, books,prop 8, poetry, a movie, etc. Is within my prism of thought(s). To see a written expression derived from self - a memory or words spoken.
Isn't the totality of anyone.
Enclosing, how I began - a snippet I've written years prior.
I was deeply saddened when I wrote this poem. I was listening to R. Kelly's I believe I can fly on the radio. I lost my ability to run, when I was 15 years old. Running was my freedom. Every time I ran, I felt as if I was flying. Hearing that song and the emotions I felt within produced this poem... This poem is also the reason why I fell in love with Alicia Keys. When I first heard her song "Caged Bird" I started to cry, If my poem was a song it would be "Caged Bird".... I feel the words of that song as if I wrote it myself. As if she went into the very essence of my being, and expressed everything I wish people could understand.
I wrote "To Be A Bird" 12 years ago, and first heard "Caged Bird" by Alicia Keys, 9 years ago.
At times I feel as if, various components in my life have evaporated. Leaving no evidence it was real, except in my mind.
I’m left with memories that cannot be touched, yet are felt. Moments I can no longer embrace, yet wraps around me in understanding.
It’s amazing how a certain word, phrase, season, fragrance or song can transform everything around me. Reverting the hands of time; resurfacing my past.
Within the recesses of my mind; a seemingly forgotten existence, is sheltered..
**********
Expressing my thoughts on paper
Unforeseen
Seeds of my evolution
Planted every day I wake up and breathe
I look in the mirror at a reflection
No one else sees…..
The Iris of my pupil deems:
To not know the answer to something makes me vulnerable to myself.
Lost in a whirlwind of temporary emotions, that cannot comfort me or talk back.
